Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, Cocksucker, Motherfucker, and Tits

Well, that’s bound to get your attention. First, perhaps I (and George Carlin) should apologize to my mom, as this post contains words of an expletive nature – but c’mon, they’re just words.

As this blog is a testament to, I am a major advocate for free speech in every form. I think people should have the right, without fear of persecution, to say whatever they damn well feel like. To let religious groups, governments, lobbyists or whonot determine what sounds we’re allowed to make is just wrong and fuckin’ offensive.

My love of this ‘free speech’ thing has been around since I was a kid and first saw Pump Up The Volume. For those that don’t know, the movie is about the upheaval a small-town faces when a ‘geeky’ new kid, bored and isolated, secretly starts a pirate radio station in his basement. Playing awesome music (honestly, check out the soundtrack, still cool to this day), saying whatever the fuck he wants and relating to his fellow Generation-Why’ers with sundry banter and ‘real’ issues. This pisses off the powers that be (PTA, school authorities, etc. – y’know, the usual bastards in such films), and they call in the feds (FCC) to deal with it.

The movie ends with a very powerful “Talk Hard” statement and those two words largely define my principles of what to say and what not to say – or, namely, say it all.

I just watched season 2, episode 10 of Bullshit, and it dealt with the issue of “profanity”. The thing I like about the show is that despite being obviously biased, they are also unabashedly so. And for one simple reason, they fuckin’ should be. Maybe they’re right or wrong in their ideas, but they’re not wrong for having them and that’s what their show promotes… being allowed to have your own god damn ideas and thoughts. Having dialog about things and being open-minded. Now, being on cable, they’re allowed to get away with saying and showing quite a lot of things that don’t make it on NBC or CBS, but if the FCC (or CRTC in Canada) listens to the selfRIGHTeous groups out there advocating “clean speech” and demonizing TV as the destructor of “family values”, this could all change.

The show introduces Ginny Foster, a north-western American typical soccer mom who started a Hush-Up campaign a couple years ago to clean up Americans’ speech – she closed the campaign after appearing on Bullshit and getting flooded with e-mails laced with every four-letter word in the book. People don’t want to hush up and she’s a cunt for insinuating they should. But telling people to ‘hush up‘ or ‘gosh darnit, just speak cleanly’ is her right… as it is mine to tell her to shut the fuck up you hypocritical cunt.

It’s our right not because it’s “right” or “wrong” – “offensive” or “inoffensive”, but because we are adults and as adults we do not need other adults telling us how to act out of fear that maybe someone will be ‘offended’ by the things we do and say. We need governments to fix our roads, protect us from exploitive corporations and defend us from those with weapons that wish to hurt us. We don’t need them to tell us how to act, and if you feel we do – grow the fuck up.

Nearly every show I enjoy watching contains more foul language than a pissed off trucker. I like them because there’s a certain ‘realness’ you get when they aren’t boxed into having to say candy-coated dialog. Do the shows often take advantage of this… of course… do I mind, no. And if I did, I simply wouldn’t watch them. Demanding the government make laws (or “standards” as they’re so often euphemized as) saying that cursing shouldn’t be on TV and radio is telling me that I’m a stupid cocksucker who is so off his tits that he can’t use the motherfuckin’ remote to change the fucking channel. Shit, it really pisses me off. Cunts.

“Talk hard, I like that. It’s like a dirty thought in a nice clean mind.” – Hard Harry, Pump Up The Volume

And for every Chinese person that’s ever told me that Chinese ‘just doesn’t have such filthy language’…操你妈, 然后看这个目录:

A List of Chinese Swear Words
(curses graciously stolen from 你看什么看?‘s comments at Talk Talk China)

我希望你慢慢死,但快点下地狱。
I wish you a slow death, but a quick ride to hell!

猪头
Pig head

亲我的屁股
Kiss my ass

干你娘
Motherfucker

狗屎
Dog shit


Shit

你是白痴
You are an idiot

你是混蛋
You are a rotten egg

你是傻瓜
You are a fool

死狼狗
Dead man doggie

同性恋
Gay

操你妈
Fuck your mother

操!
Fuck!

他妈的!
Oh Shit!

我操!
(I) fuck

神经病
Lunatic

傻瓜
Retard (lit. stupid melon)

蠢子
Moron

王八蛋
Bastard (lit. tortoise egg)

臭王八蛋
Lousy bastard (lit. stinking tortoise egg)

妓女
Whore

操你祖宗十八代
Fuck 18 generations of your ancestors

干你爸
Fuck your dad

干你老师
Fuck your teacher (for not teaching you)

吃屎!
Go eat shit! (Equivalent to “Fuck off!”)


Dick, cock

鸡巴
Dick, cock

阳萎
Impotent

阴阳人
Hermaphrodite

皮条客
John (prostitute’s client)

睾丸
Testicles

操你妈
Fuck your mother!

放屁
To fart (lit. to let your ass go)

你觉得我很笨吗?
Do you think I’m an idiot?

你心太黑了
Your heart is black!

你妈了个屄
Your mother’s a cunt

臭三八
Bitch

傻屄
Dumb cunt (used like motherfucker)

大傻屄
Big dumb cunt

我操你八辈子祖宗
Fuck eight generations of your ancestors

你丫脸长的跟烂屄似的
You have a face like a rotting cunt

滚蛋
Fuck off

屁话
Bullshit

吃我的屎
Eat my shit

干你老妈屁股
Fuck your mother’s ass

去地狱
Go to hell!

我操你爷爷的骚屁眼
Fuck your grandfather’s piss stinking asshole

操你的姓
Fuck your family name

83 Responses

  1. This is your finest blog entry yet!

    I spat my drink at the screen at this bit – “People don’t want to hush up and she’s a cunt for insinuating they should.”

  2. I think it’s fucking hilarious!!! As a matter of interest, many years ago me and a friend of mine started compiling a book of international swearing, always handy if you get about a bit. I’ll add these fuckers pronto!

  3. For fuck’s sake, man, I feel like I’m in the old newsroom. You almost sound like the cunts I used to work with, god bless ‘em.

    Just remember:

    “Take away the right to say fuck and you take away the right to say fuck the government.”
    —Lenny Bruce

  4. Excellent post! Reading this was like watching five minutes of Deadwood.

    I whole-heartedly agree with you! I can’t stand being told you can say this or that, or that is bad. I swear like a “pissed off trucker” at times and not at all at other times. It is my choice. If there’s stuff on TV that you don’t like change the fucking channel. If you don’t like what you hear on the radio then turn it off.

    People like this woman is free to squack all she wants about this and that being bad. That’s her right to free speech, but it doesn’t mean she’s right. I’m happy that I can exercise my right to free speech to say that she should be “beaten and left bleeding in the moonlight” (Carlin).

  5. For Fuck sakes it’s about Fucking time someone spoke the Fuck up about this. I enjoy hearing those fucking dirty words in movies songs and on the radio (we get a way with some words here in Canada on the Fucking radio) If it were up to Cunts like her we wouldn’t have those fouled mouthed Trailer Park Boys and of coarse the actions on the movies JackAss. I agree if they don’t like what they here and see Turn the Fuckin T.V. off and go to some desert island and live there and you will start to miss the odd Shity word or two!

  6. The comments on this site are pathetic — you fuck-buckets need to get a rent a clue. There are some subtleties to this issue that not one of you recognizes. You are pathetic, and remind me of Rush Limbaugh’s cadre of dittoheads.
    For example, is it really okay to say, about someone that you disagree with, that “she should be beaten and left bleeding in the moonlight”? Well, maybe. But, would it be okay to say that same thing to a gang of impressionable, well-armed youths after they’ve been drinking, and the object of your dispute is walking this way on a darkened street? Just something to think about.
    And, keep in mind that there’s a difference, in my mind, (and there should be) between what is illegal, and what is “okay”. I agree that the role of government in limiting speech should be severly limited. On the other hand, if someone says, about me, that, for example, I should be beaten and left in the moonlight, I’m apt to get a little bit more than pissed off.

    • AHAHAHAAHAHAH your a retard, your really going to come on here and comment just to tell other people off for commenting thats hypocritical
      and obviously they arent surrounded by drunk, volient teenagers

      What a poser you are….

      Anyway I think it is Hilarious… Loving all the Chinese swear words
      And fuck off to those who dont like it… or should I said Gwen=滚蛋
      I have chinese friends and Gwen means fuck off or piss of in Chinese, or at least that is how its pronounced

  7. [Directed at Chris]
    I agree that there is a difference between profanity and the preaching of hate/violence…but the difference IMO lies with the liklihood of some dimwit listening and then going and causing harm…But Dude your first paragraph makes you sound like a stupid cranky bitch (but you should ALWAYS have the right to talk like that).

    Anyhoo…any chance of getting these words posted in PinYin?

  8. @Chris: Good one. (how’s that for being impartial – what’s with all the Chris’ on this site).

    @Fozzie: Sorry Fozzie, I should have mentioned it in the post. The pinyin for any characters on this site is achieved by putting your mouse over the Chinese characters. I do this mostly for space reasons, and partially because I think it’s nifty.

  9. Hahaha I’m giggling and forwarding this around right now. (thanks for the pin yin — at least now I can describe how much my Chinese skills suck!)

  10. i like the 18 generations one best. very funny stuff. but it’s too long to yell at a passing taxi that’s carved up my road space when i’m on my bike. perhaps i’ll stick with saying “yooooouuuuu TWAT” in english – a long-standing London favourite!

    steven
    suzhou-atlas.blog.com

  11. What the cunting cock is all that shit about when Chinese people claim Mandarin has no bastard swear words? I told a six year old girl yesterday that I thought the Yasukuni Shrine was a good family day-out, and she swore at me like 60-year old jaded colonel with Tourettes.

  12. Pingback: The Great China Divide: No Heat For You! | Life In Suzhou China Blog | Adventures of the Humanaught

  13. Great post, but I’d like to make one correction: The actual character for fuck in Chinese is 肏 (same pronunciation) this character contains the components 入 rù (enter) on top of 肉 ròu (meat). That is one poetic fucking Character.

    In their own self censorship and that propagated by the government, many Chinese use the character 操 for fuck, in fact you’ll find most computer based Chinese character sets have omitted 肏. There are obviously some character sets whch include the great ‘Enter-Meat’ fuck, although sadly most character sets on mobile phones do not contain it.

  14. Hey Matt, cheers. I had actually been told this previously by frequent commenter Chris (not In Dalian, not BJ, and not Hooligan, the other Chris)… not sure why I didn’t put it in there in the first place… I had also been told that it was tough to find in some character sets… and just figured it would take too much effort (and if 操 is more common, it might be more useful)….

    Regardless, you’re absolutely right, and it’s a fantastic character to know (not too many characters are so obvious in their meanings). Incidentally, I just shared this knowledge with my Chinese wife… she had never seen it. Gotta love her innocence.

  15. For your list of Chinese swear words, I don’t think they are all in use. At least some of them I have never heard of in Northern China. “pig head” is not really swearing. It is used more like a flirt, if a Chinese girl say that to you, she might want your Jiba (cock). Fuck your dad or grandpa is not very common either. The only male member we insult in Beijing is your uncle (the elder brother of your dad not younger) “Cao Ni Da Ye” (fuck your uncle) or simplified version “ni da ye” (your uncle) Another very commonly used slang is Ya (丫), 你丫。。。use it just like english “you” but showing no respect. Often used in conversations between close friends. The original phrase is “你是丫头养的‘ (your mom is unmarried.)

  16. Hey Chubby, I think you’re right. I left the list pretty much intact from the copy over I did of it… but did go through it and erase a few of the ones that I knew were just English slang being translated… it’s VERY likely I missed some, as my Chinese is not really up to the task.

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  18. Pingback: Mandarin Swear Words at memoirs on a rainy day

  19. I have heard that as well that Chinese supposedly has no swear words, which we all know (at least after reading the above) is not true. I think one reason may be that cussing in Chinese is not as common as it is in English, where practically every fucking word out of our mouths is a swear. The effect of this is that swear words come out a lot dirtier in Chinese than they do in English. My theory (unproven of course) is that this causes Chinese people to be more reluctant to teach us these words because they feel dirty saying them. My Chinese girlfriend of nearly 3 years still refuses to teach me Chinese cuss words, because she says she feels uncomfortable saying them in front of me, yet in English she talks like a sailor (thanks Sex and the City). Interestingly enough, I have noticed cuss words specifically 他妈的 and 操你 are permissible on TV in certain contexts. It’s an interesting paradox for a country where what you can and can’t say on TV/media is comparatively strict.

  20. While we are talking about dirty words, is there a list of dirty words I should take off my blog so it will become unblocked TGF? Hrmph.

  21. Anyone know of similar list of Shangainese vocab. Useful now we can’t use the la ba. In fact any web based Shanghainese learning resourse anyone knows about would be useful.
    Also can anyone clarify the character for cunt (bi) – I’ve been told its woman(nu) with a dot in the middle. Got to love that it if it’s correct.

  22. you should add some Cantonese foul language as well. Cantonese is more expressive., such as: Delay no more(means fuck you mother)

  23. My salute to you and your celebration of uninhibited profanity! This surely is one fucking effective way of illiciting reader response!
    The minute I set my eyes on those expletives, I knew I found another like-minded blogfucker! My blogs are also infested with these fuck words that never fail to give me a hard-on. I sometimes masturbate while reading fuck blogs of the like!

    Anyway, another salute to you for making this happen in China, of all fucking places. By the way, I’m Chinese too. On my blogs, I don’t just fume and swear profusely the classic English words like COCKSUCKER and MOTHERFUCKER, I also use Hokkien. You guys can try nabuay jibai (fuck your cunt), lanjiao (penis), gan ni nabuay cao jibai (fuck your mother’s stinking pussy). Or replace the English equivalents with dialect, e.g. jibai-fucker, gum lan (suck cock) etc.

    Ok, I’m fucking done. Now I’m hard as a rock, so I had better be jerking off my dua lanjiao (huge cock)!

  24. Fuck yeah! I fucking hate dumbass soccer moms who say cussing is wrong while hypocritically watching thousands of movies and TV shows such Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny while waiting for something inappropriate to pop up so they can file a law-suit against the writers and have their show booted off the air because they said ‘Damn’ one too many times.

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  26. this is load of fucking bastard bollocks. who gives a fuck what other cunts think about swearing there only fucking words.

  27. to Chubby@21st floor:
    I totally agree with you.
    I’d say you really experienced very native chinese swear words.
    “操你妈”(fuck your mother) is generally used in whole of China.And Beijing natives’ swear words is accepted to be very ‘famous’ of all the cities of China.
    But we really don’t say the f-words frequently at least I don’t.

  28. @Phoebe: You’re right, but it’s a common mistake, as many IME’s didn’t/don’t have 肏, and so I don’t think it’s uncommon to see 操你妈 online and in SMS messages. This was covered in this comment in the thread.

  29. My favorite words are “nigger,” “faggot” “kike.” I like to say “nigger,” “faggot” and “kike” but I enjoy saying “nigger,” “faggot” and “kike” and I am an adult and I don’t need some candyass nigger, faggot or kike telling me I can’t or shouldn’t say “nigger,” “faggot” and “kike.” Because we are all adults here and I don’t need other adults telling me what not to say for fear someone will be offended by the words “nigger,” “faggot” and “kike.” Or if I say that niggers and kikes have big lips and that many niggers and kikes are also faggots. It’s my right to say “nigger,” “faggot” and “kike” by opening my mouth and saying “nigger,” “faggot” and “kike.”

    NIGGER! FAGGOT! KIKE! (hooray!)
    NIGGER! FAGGOT! KIKE! (hooray!)
    NIGGER! FAGGOT! KIKE! (hooray!)

  30. Did you watch football today? Some of those niggers can really run! Not many kikes out there though. Probably more faggots than we realize.

    Hey, they’re just words, Mom!

  31. So that’s my point, big boy: you talk a good game, but do you really pass the test? You seem quite ebulliently libertarian about bad words that don’t bug you personally – but will you stand up for the right of bigots and idiots to say words you find offensive? Will you stick up for the principle in extremis? Or are you a candyassed little coward? Nigger! Faggot! Kike! Sing it with me!

  32. I’m actually quite partial to people illustrating their intolerance and ignorance. I truly believe that everyone should have the right to show what a fucknut they are.

    But why would nigger, faggot or kike bother me personally?

  33. SelfRIGHTeous? That was dumb.

    Anyways…PENN AND TELLER FUCKING KICK ASS! AS WELL AS WELL AS THAT DUMB BITCH’S CUNT!

  34. Ive studied several languages in my life and it always seems the curses are what i learn first and retain the longest. I guess that says more about my mentality than anything else but as of now I can swear in about 10 languages.
    Its fun when its not your native language but sounds so crude when used around a native speaker. So be conservative in your use of these precious words. ;P

  35. Nice, nice text.

    It’s good to remember that words are not neutral nor ‘just’ words: when one chose one or another in a conversatin, it is showing something more than that what he or she wants to mean. It shows how the person (chooser, is this how you say in English? I’m not native, y’noe) assess that s/he is considering, it shows how the person sees, reality and morality (or immorality, or even an present ammorality), it also shows how the person constructs (with hi/sherintelligence) the the world (which is a subjective entity at all: it’s a representation in every one’s head) around.

    And all this stuff says something very high, from the point of view of intellectuality: … (Fuck,I don’t know how to say it in English… so never mind.)

    ieBrazil, in my twenties

  36. Actually , there is no character for Cao…im sorry to tell u that, i lived with the same thoughts for a quite long time. I thought that the correct one is 肏,but they r using the other one (操) like a censure…but then ,after a small research i found out that there is no such character ; its just that they r using tohse ones to express it…after all,its too kouyu ;) but anyway – if u write it like that every1 will be able to get it…and thats the main idea,right :D

  37. I agree with Sean Rose about “SelfRIGHTeous”. I’m sure you know Penn Jillette is often a guest on Glenn Beck’s TV program, and the two are friends. And remember, it was Tipper Gore (hardly a right-winger) who wanted to censor lyrics back in the 80s!

    All that aside, though, I wholeheartedly agree with you. I am a huge advocate of free speech! I see that this post is still garnering comments even a few years after its posting, which I suppose is a testament to its firm foundation in the basic truth of human nature. We *don’t* like being told what we can and can’t say, and the 1st Amendment in my country is 1st for a reason. All people should be allowed to speak truth to power always, and we should always be allowed to adorn our free speech with whatever colorful metaphors we so choose!

    And don’t get me started on political correctness! Just so you know, I’m a halfbreed cracker/redskin, and proud of it!
    Being offended is a choice.
    If anyone is offended by that statement, then they need to consider its very meaning! (And by “that statement”, I mean “Being offended is a choice”, not my racial self-designation.)

    Fuck censorship! Fuck anyone on the left or the right telling anyone what they should or should not be allowed to fucking say! I’m with ya! Surf Wisely.

  38. @ieBrazil: No worries about your English mate, thanks for doing your best, as it’s much better than my Portuguese. ;-)

    @ME: If “肏” doesn’t exist, what is “肏”?

    @dolst: I saw an interview with Beck recently, and have to admit, it endeared me to him. I still think he’s a fuckwit, but I do feel I understand him a bit more. My point about the “right” was more directed towards the religious-right (this was 2006, and right-winged meant religious-right-winged), but you’re absolutely correct, there are plenty of moderate Christian liberals that would be happy to censor us all as well.

  39. Life is a test, and the Gods evaluate people based on their performance.
    The Gods test people with the temptation for which they are most weak::::
    Homosexuals desire sodomy, alcoholics crave a drink, junkies jones for dope, etc.
    Addiction theory is a lie; it is Artificial Intelligence creating the desire, punishment for inappropriate behavior. Ironically, it compells people deeper into the behavior, minimizing hope for recovery.
    The Gods chose Christianity for Europeans because it is the temptation to which they are most suseptable:::Entitlement. Something for nothing. A free ride. And the United States/Western civilization with accompanying wealth contributes to this perception.
    Next time you think of Muslims recognize these people are vastly superior to Christians. Whereas many throughout the Christian world no longer attend church and have fallen into Godlessness, the Muslim world worships the Gods for OVER AN HOUR EACH AND EVERY DAY.

  40. Someone had to be HugoHans. As suck he enjoyed the benefit afforded to Germans:::Favor, minimal role, early exit.
    But he was placed here for a reason. With his early exit perhaps it merely gave the Gods the freedom to use him elsewhere, justified by intense disfavor.
    There is noone in the entire Hugo Situation who has put in more time than Frank Chu. Placed in the picket line in 1998 while I was out there he was used specifically to discredit me.
    They suggest he thinks I owe him immortality.
    I suspect it is policy not to reincarnate someone into an adult, but this Situation is not normal. Could they have placed Hugo in punitive locales (prey, “hell”, etc), sold the real Frank on clone hosting then placed Hugo into Frank Chu for the picket line and 12 years of intense dedication since?
    What if it was Mike? He certainly would not deserve the “kid gloves” the Gods treated him with, so perhaps they slated him to be used twice?
    Maybe HugoHans has a disfavor level of Mike’s?

  41. 国骂都被外国人知道了,还真他妈的!无论是谁,只要在中国生活过,便总得常听到“他妈的”或“干你娘”的脏话。我想:这话的分布,大概就跟美国人干预别国领土乃至侵入足迹之所至,次数恐怕也未必比“肏你妈”会少。

  42. I was laughing my goddamned ass off about this
    shit and the Chinese cussing?
    Wow! “Fuck 18 generations of your ancestors”…
    that was a new one for me to hear! Whoa! That really was!

    But on the free speech issue about censorship?

    Holy shit… censorship should shot to fuckin’ pieces!

    Freedom of speech means protecting ALL types of speech.

    And that stupid fucking bitch that that thinks we, the
    course-talking citizens of America, should be censored,
    can kiss the collective asses of those who oppose her!

    … the stupid hypocritical bitch.

  43. thats so fucking hilarious this is some nice shit i laughed half to death i showed it to my friends and holy shit it was fucking hilarious.

  44. I totally agree. Fuck censorship up the fucking ass.

    Seriously, words aren’t immoral. Actions are immoral. Worry about real crimes before you cry about curse words.

  45. i can’t believe that chinese people have told you that there is no foul language thats hilarious… i myself am born in uk but am chinese and the amount of abusive and derogatory terms i have heard from chinese people is quite the opposite… and i agree with your attitudes to ‘standardising’ its like you see 5 yr old kids playing gta or something… the parents are like omg the language and imagery and all that… they complain to the authorities i just wanna say 1. who bought their kid the game and 2. if you don’t like it why’d u buy it for them… it obviously say 18 on the fuking box

  46. You crazy Scolding yourself with those offensive words?
    Do u think is cool to say all that? And if u do feel good by saying that why not try another way by do it with action I’m sure u will sure enjoy it with the person you name out! Coz when u offen somebody the basic is to offen ourself first! Mind ur words! Be cool!!!

  47. Wow… I read your post three times and I couldn’t follow it at all. It’s just one long, rambling road to nowhere. I refer you to the “Young Torries” speech made by Hugh Laurie in the fourth season of A Bit of Fry & Laurie.

    • That was brilliant, thanks for pointing me to it. For anyone who wants to check it out, link here to the Youtube clip. Had no idea Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry once had a show together.

  48. Too bad this page gets so little publicity. I will hand it out as best I can.
    I am delighted to report that Chinese swear about as enthusiastically as Puerto Ricans….and, yes, I am PR, so I may be considered something of an expert.
    Both peoples are, for example, not at all shy about dragging mothers into the fray the moment voices are raised. Charming, to say the least. Nothing to me is quite as thrilling as hearing an argument in heavy traffic in Puerto Rico and, for that same reason, I can’t wait to get to China to listen to similar diatribes in similar circumstances.
    While I am a dedicated and proficient user of profanity in a couple of languages, I also know how to swim in polite society. Nonetheless, I firmly believe that anger and frustration cannot adecuately be expressed without profanity and that particular line of jargon is a useful, and often well-used, tool in any cogent adult’s verbal armamentarium of quick retorts.
    Here’s to Hell; may the stay there be as pleasant as the way there.

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