Carrefour-3-2-1 – Protest!

So, the fateful day has arrived – the day when Carrefour unleashes its anti-China, pride-taking, I-fart-in-your-general-direction May Holiday sale on the masses of Chinese willing to sell out their nation in order to save a few jiao.

The sale, of course, is backed by French members of the Eight-Nation Alliance, who were frozen more than 100 years ago with strict instructions to be thawed out to mastermind just this occasion.

Ah, but China is no fool this time around. Foreign insults will not be taken sitting down. Hell no, China is a Great Nation now. One of honour, pride, common sense, power, and a whole string of other Great adjectives.

No, the Bag’er Revolution is upon us! Where the Boxers failed, the Bag’ers shall not! We will hold up signs and hassle ALL patrons of Carrefour, using our bodies, our BODIES!, to block their way. We, alone, stand as the last bastion of Chinese self-respect. We have risen to the occasion, and now hold the line that must educate those ignorant Chinese that would trade their country for ‘Two Yuan Off’ sales.

jinjing_carrefour.jpgWe will show the world that we know, yes WE KNOW! what is REALLY going on in censortive word. We invite all our foreign friends to come to beautiful China and see for themselves what it is REALLY like in censortive word. No, not just what the evil censortive word and his mouthpiece CNN want you to believe. Don’t you know the people of censortive word have more freedoms than us Chinese erm… people-in-China-but-outside-censortive word? They can have AS MANY CHILDREN AS THEY WANT! Really! As many!

Wait… what do you mean there’s no sale? There are signs in the Carrefour window informing thrifty hopefuls that in fact there is no sale today?

But, but… if there’s no sale, does this mean possibly that there were other falsities in the call to arms SMS message I received from my very good and patriotic friends? Wait, does this mean that maybe the CEO of Carrefour doesn’t hang out with the censortive word and China bash? Oh boy, does this mean that France really doesn’t hate China and we’ve just spent the last two weeks on a self-serving nationalistic rampage that is as stupid as it is wide-spread?

Oh no…. [lowering head] does this mean that we Chinese have presented the rest of the world with the exact image we were trying to show them we are not?

[rising head with new found vigor] Hell no!

Down with Carrefour! Down with Carrefour! China’s Olympics! One (country) World, One Dream! Fuck you France, fuck you Rest of the World, we don’t need your kind! We don’t need your common sense! We are Chinese! We are proud! We are strong!

7 Responses

  1. I just got back from Carrefour, which I chose over my usual Auchan becuase I expected fewer crowds.. well inside at least. I was disgusted to find it was full of race traitors buying all sorts shit.

    Vive la Résistance dumbass students!

  2. When people protest against Carrefour (aka the French), they are portrayed as some aggressive nationalists. When they go buy stuff from Carrefour (again, aka, the French), they are seen as some race traitors. You are damned if you don’t and you are damned if you do.

    What do you people want?

  3. @Nick: The Mrs. was there this morning – quite loved the fact that there was such a small crowd (again, inside). Got a bit nervous though at the fact that the place was surrounded by folks yelling and holding signs – and that police were telling her to head to a different supermarket to avoid an “incident”.

    @RedThumb: I think you missed the sarcasm in Nick’s comment. It’s not the fine educated folks that read this blog that are calling anyone “race traitors”. Aggressive, ignorant, dumbass nationalists… well… if it quacks like a duck.

  4. @Ryan: I’m almost sad I missed it! The fact is that in a country of 1.3 bill a million dumbasses can easily be mistakenly be percieved as the voice of the nation. When I was there there it was full of nice sane people, and the staff were kind and friendly.

  5. I don’t really see what the big deal is. I’ve always hated the French but continue to eat french rolls, drink french wine, french cheese, I still sit in an Airbus when I need to. Good products don’t make me like you, it just makes me buy from you… I will continue the bad mouth the French any chance I get regardless of how good they make their Duck Liver.

  6. Got back to the ‘Zhou on Saturday midnight after 7 weeks Down Under, then off to Auchan for a bit of shopping with Mrs. Jamieson last night. Same swarm of crowds. Got a hell of a surprise when some CH lady bumped me and said *Excuse Me*. I was shocked/surprised. Must have been from *elsewhere*. Had an interesting (disbelieving) chat with Mrs J. about the cordite smell & blood way over in the other parts. Told her we had *unedited* TV images in Oz about the shenanigans, but she insisted it was those bl**dy other folks who did the lock and load, not *our boys*. Hmmmm.

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