Comments on: My Changing Life In China http://www.ryan-mclaughlin.com/blog/farrago/my-changing-life-in-china/ I'm a dad, designer, China expat and blogger Tue, 31 Jan 2012 07:41:49 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Ryan http://www.ryan-mclaughlin.com/blog/farrago/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9634 Ryan Sat, 17 Mar 2007 03:22:16 +0000 http://www.thehumanaught.com/blog/2007/03/14/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9634 @JohnB: I totally agree about knowing the language being a major assister in making life here easier - I just liked the boyz at Sinocidal's take on it. I doubt there was much seriousness intended by it. Still, it does piss me off to understand more of what's being said but not have the suitably suave language to defend myself. I can be extremely polite and extremely rude... but not so much the "subtle" in-between. I also agree that learning the language first would of course be great... generally life never works that way though, eh? @JohnB: I totally agree about knowing the language being a major assister in making life here easier – I just liked the boyz at Sinocidal’s take on it. I doubt there was much seriousness intended by it. Still, it does piss me off to understand more of what’s being said but not have the suitably suave language to defend myself. I can be extremely polite and extremely rude… but not so much the “subtle” in-between.

I also agree that learning the language first would of course be great… generally life never works that way though, eh?

]]> By: John B http://www.ryan-mclaughlin.com/blog/farrago/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9497 John B Thu, 15 Mar 2007 05:52:47 +0000 http://www.thehumanaught.com/blog/2007/03/14/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9497 I think it was right around my second year that I really started to get disenfranchised with the whole "living in China" thing. I think it was a matter of knowing enough to get me angry but not enough to really solve things (particularly in terms of language). The Sinocidal post you linked to is bunk, IMHO. For every pain that actually understanding what's being said around you brings, it helps you about a thousand times. If I had to do all over again I would have holed myself up in some little village with nothing but my books and people that couldn't speak a word of English for the first year and gotten where I am now <strong>first</strong>, and then got on with my life here. I think it was right around my second year that I really started to get disenfranchised with the whole “living in China” thing. I think it was a matter of knowing enough to get me angry but not enough to really solve things (particularly in terms of language). The Sinocidal post you linked to is bunk, IMHO. For every pain that actually understanding what’s being said around you brings, it helps you about a thousand times. If I had to do all over again I would have holed myself up in some little village with nothing but my books and people that couldn’t speak a word of English for the first year and gotten where I am now first, and then got on with my life here.

]]> By: hek http://www.ryan-mclaughlin.com/blog/farrago/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9470 hek Wed, 14 Mar 2007 21:56:27 +0000 http://www.thehumanaught.com/blog/2007/03/14/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9470 you failed to mentioned CCTV 9, which I might at is what they show the prisoners at Guantanamo Bay in Cuba. Hek you failed to mentioned CCTV 9, which I might at is what they show the prisoners at Guantanamo Bay in Cuba.

Hek

]]> By: Shanshu http://www.ryan-mclaughlin.com/blog/farrago/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9460 Shanshu Wed, 14 Mar 2007 19:42:18 +0000 http://www.thehumanaught.com/blog/2007/03/14/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9460 Good post, man! I enjoyed it. I bet there would have been lots of things about Barcelona that would have bugged us, if we had all stayed longer. Oh, and I TOTALLY agree with you, on the cheap thing. I am a big believer in paying extra, to ensure quality. Both for service, and goods. It's just better that way, and totally worth the extra few bucks to me. Good post, man! I enjoyed it. I bet there would have been lots of things about Barcelona that would have bugged us, if we had all stayed longer.

Oh, and I TOTALLY agree with you, on the cheap thing. I am a big believer in paying extra, to ensure quality. Both for service, and goods. It’s just better that way, and totally worth the extra few bucks to me.

]]> By: Ryan http://www.ryan-mclaughlin.com/blog/farrago/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9426 Ryan Wed, 14 Mar 2007 10:19:11 +0000 http://www.thehumanaught.com/blog/2007/03/14/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9426 The bargaining thing for me is just lose/lose. I get ripped off and I'm left feeling like I've caused the family of the shopkeeper to go without food tonight (which, of course, is not the case... but is definitely the feeling I'm often left with). While my family was visiting for the wedding I had to do a lot of their bargaining (at least initially).. and while bargaining in shops is a pain... bargaining for souvenirs is a papercut on the sphincter. CLB: Man, I need to go to Turkey. Chris: I can't get enough of it either... I walk down the little hutong to my community and there's always a chuar grill going... and my mind lights up, my mouth starts salivating... and just as I'm about to order I look at the squaller around me, and realize there's one less stray... and I walk on. CS: Yep, I think there's something wrong with you :-) But I definitely hear ya on the becoming vague thing. Perhaps this is why it takes 50 questions to get a simple sentence answer from most people here. The bargaining thing for me is just lose/lose. I get ripped off and I’m left feeling like I’ve caused the family of the shopkeeper to go without food tonight (which, of course, is not the case… but is definitely the feeling I’m often left with). While my family was visiting for the wedding I had to do a lot of their bargaining (at least initially).. and while bargaining in shops is a pain… bargaining for souvenirs is a papercut on the sphincter.

CLB: Man, I need to go to Turkey.

Chris: I can’t get enough of it either… I walk down the little hutong to my community and there’s always a chuar grill going… and my mind lights up, my mouth starts salivating… and just as I’m about to order I look at the squaller around me, and realize there’s one less stray… and I walk on.

CS: Yep, I think there’s something wrong with you :-) But I definitely hear ya on the becoming vague thing. Perhaps this is why it takes 50 questions to get a simple sentence answer from most people here.

]]> By: China Snippets http://www.ryan-mclaughlin.com/blog/farrago/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9420 China Snippets Wed, 14 Mar 2007 07:59:35 +0000 http://www.thehumanaught.com/blog/2007/03/14/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9420 I have actually entered a new period in my bargaining life. I kind of like it again. Since Xiang Yang market was taken of the map I haven't been doing a lot of it since I happily pay a kuai too much in the fresh market. Last Sunday though, due to a baby boom among my friends we had to get gifts so we set out to one of the Xiang Yang replacements on Nanjing Xi Lu and I rather enjoyed it. Maybe there's something wrong with me:) I've never been too thrilled about too curious people, whether Chinese or else. I do occasionally have a nice face off with Chinese at parties when they start asking me about my salary. I mostly ask them whether they ask their fellow country men the same after 5 minutes of knowing eachother. That a. ends the conversation right away or b. results in some excuse and the end of the conversation Like you said, it’s considered just as rude here as it is anywhere. It's a tad sad though as I consequently become vaguer in answering whatever question regardless who's asking. You work? Yes. What do you do? Internet. You? Business, What kind of business? Buying & selling. I have actually entered a new period in my bargaining life. I kind of like it again. Since Xiang Yang market was taken of the map I haven’t been doing a lot of it since I happily pay a kuai too much in the fresh market. Last Sunday though, due to a baby boom among my friends we had to get gifts so we set out to one of the Xiang Yang replacements on Nanjing Xi Lu and I rather enjoyed it. Maybe there’s something wrong with me:)

I’ve never been too thrilled about too curious people, whether Chinese or else. I do occasionally have a nice face off with Chinese at parties when they start asking me about my salary. I mostly ask them whether they ask their fellow country men the same after 5 minutes of knowing eachother. That a. ends the conversation right away or b. results in some excuse and the end of the conversation

Like you said, it’s considered just as rude here as it is anywhere. It’s a tad sad though as I consequently become vaguer in answering whatever question regardless who’s asking. You work? Yes. What do you do? Internet. You? Business, What kind of business? Buying & selling.

]]> By: Chris (in Dalian) http://www.ryan-mclaughlin.com/blog/farrago/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9413 Chris (in Dalian) Wed, 14 Mar 2007 04:27:52 +0000 http://www.thehumanaught.com/blog/2007/03/14/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9413 Bargaining has never been my forte either. It just feels so slimy. I let two of my students bargain for me once, a CCP member and one aspiring to be so, very upstanding gals and nice in class. They were helping me shop for a scarf and beanie, which would have cost 30 kuai. As soon as we get into prices, they start laying into the shopkeeper, just letting her have the full salvo. I didn't follow any of this, but it all sounded like they were insulting each others' ancestors eight generations back while putting me on some grand pedestal because I'm an ESL teacher. After a few rounds of this, I was ready to say: "Just leave the poor woman in peace. I can afford 30 kuai." They wouldn't let me, of course. While one argued, the other told me, "Don't worry, she'll get it down to 20." She did, but I've felt like a bad person ever since. It was, perhaps, one of the more frightening things I've seen in China. As for the rest, I'm hitting saturation point on Ting bu dong (hence the Chinese classes) and the questions. But I'll stick by chuar for now. Can't get enough of that stuff. Bargaining has never been my forte either. It just feels so slimy.

I let two of my students bargain for me once, a CCP member and one aspiring to be so, very upstanding gals and nice in class. They were helping me shop for a scarf and beanie, which would have cost 30 kuai. As soon as we get into prices, they start laying into the shopkeeper, just letting her have the full salvo. I didn’t follow any of this, but it all sounded like they were insulting each others’ ancestors eight generations back while putting me on some grand pedestal because I’m an ESL teacher. After a few rounds of this, I was ready to say: “Just leave the poor woman in peace. I can afford 30 kuai.” They wouldn’t let me, of course. While one argued, the other told me, “Don’t worry, she’ll get it down to 20.”

She did, but I’ve felt like a bad person ever since. It was, perhaps, one of the more frightening things I’ve seen in China.

As for the rest, I’m hitting saturation point on Ting bu dong (hence the Chinese classes) and the questions. But I’ll stick by chuar for now. Can’t get enough of that stuff.

]]> By: China Law Blog http://www.ryan-mclaughlin.com/blog/farrago/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9407 China Law Blog Wed, 14 Mar 2007 03:28:16 +0000 http://www.thehumanaught.com/blog/2007/03/14/my-changing-life-in-china/#comment-9407 Great post. I got sick of the bargaining the very first time. I hate it because I know I am getting ripped off, and yet I hate the bargaining so much and the spending 20 minutes to save a dollar so much, that I just can't do it. I lived in Turkey for a year and I used to love bargaining there. There, it's a friendly social thing. You talk soccer, you bargain, you talk weather, you bargain, you talk politics, you bargain, you drink tea, you bargain. In China, it feels like life or death. Great post. I got sick of the bargaining the very first time. I hate it because I know I am getting ripped off, and yet I hate the bargaining so much and the spending 20 minutes to save a dollar so much, that I just can’t do it. I lived in Turkey for a year and I used to love bargaining there. There, it’s a friendly social thing. You talk soccer, you bargain, you talk weather, you bargain, you talk politics, you bargain, you drink tea, you bargain. In China, it feels like life or death.

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